Historical Update

Monday, Aug. 4: I managed to get through yesterday without a single bloody nose. Feeling on a roll, I called Oncology. They suggested a visit for a complete blood workup and exam. This revealed satisfactory blood chemistry, if not ideal blood volume. White counts acceptable. My Dr. reminded me that chemotherapy is very difficult. I can't expect to feel like I did when I started. Apparently feeling cold, numb and dizzy is all part of the shakeup. Tuesday, Aug. 5: Spent the day feeling awful! I huddled shaking and frozen under the comforter in my heated waterbed when I wasn't warding off nausea with fresh tea. This is day 16? Next week I have to face another treatment. Kill me now. Wed: Aug. 6: I doggedly agreed to tend sweet Caroline, sure that attitude was half my battle. Only her two naps saved us, and Jamilyn, who returned home from Logan at 3:00. When Adam arrived after 4, he took one look at me and said, "Mom, you have a fever!" He scrounged out a thermometer from our first aid kit and sho' nuff--103.8. He called Oncology who told them to take me to the hospital. Jamilyn did the duty (another family member awarded sainthood), the magnitude of having cancer settling on her young shoulders like an 80 pound vulture. We shared some tears then waited from 5pm to 2am to know that I would have to stay. Em and Dave came to hold Jamilyn up until Blake got there. Erin came too. I have great kids. Thurs. Aug. 6: Froze to death all night, sweatin' in the arctic wing of the hospital. How much more blood can I afford to donate to science? I think they tested my blood on the hour all night. Even with IV antibiotics, the fever won't chase. I'm dehydrated, so the fluids are running full time. One by one, I hear opinions about everything from port contamination to internal combustion! Tomorrow, cultures will reveal the truth. Adam came early and adjusted my thermostat. He's a bright child. Em came up and Erin brought the boys over. Nurses got serious about getting my digestive system back to functional. Good luck with that. It's been 12 days! Fri. Aug 7: I have a raging UTI (my first) that I mistook for side-effects of chemotherapy. My NP oncologist said that my diagnosis made her want to cry for what chemo people patiently endure in the name of treatment, in our ignorance. I guess regular folks who have urinary tract infections think they're pretty miserable. My fever still won't regulate, topping at 104.1. Even though I don't have a port/blood infection after all, we'll go back to IV antibiotics. I also need two units of blood. Em came to my rescue in the moment of truth, assuring me that I wasn't going to be blood brothers with any aids-infested transient (that thought feels so mean to me now!) I officially vomited for the first time since beginning chemotherapy, but it was because of an oral antibiotic that refused to play. I felt SO coordinated to wake from a deep, drug induced sleep, recognize nausea, grab an available tub, empty the contents onto the floor (except for my toothbrush--ew!), push the nurse button, declare "vomiting" and successfully hit the tub with resulting spew. For that I got clean sheets in the middle of the night "just because". After so much excitement I couldn't sleep. I enjoyed the view from my ninth-floor corner window, of our beautiful, twinkly valley via State Street and 53rd. Sat: Aug. 8: Fever regulated, success at the potty, going home. Yahoo! Lunch finally tasted good. It was necessary for Emily to leave her beloved work in transfusion to assist me in getting home, since no one else was conveniently available. This was a huge sacrifice for her, and I tried to make sure she knew that I realized it! Sunday Aug. 9: Blake left for Washington D.C. this morning. Jamilyn is officially on duty to babysit the chemoqueen for her last week in Utah. The kids all came for dinner to wish her well and say goodbye. Everybody helped out. It was nice to be together. Blake called and was sad. Monday Aug. 10: Jamilyn and I composed a mammoth "to do" list of needs and wants for our last week together. We got it all done from Chemotherapy #5 right down to clean, new skins on our I-pods/Macs, seeing "Traveling Pants" together Thursday afternoon and sharing yummy food at Rumbi's AND Macaroni Grill. I was so happy that food tasted good. We test-drove her new GPS to find her roommate's garden reception in Alpine, christening the amazing miracle machine "Estelle"--our new best friend! My baby took good care of her chemomom, and she drove away Friday morning without looking back. I know she worries about me. Love you PD.