No News--Good News

Nothing much new to report, except that I've felt great this "off" week. Tomorrow I'll resume taking Xeloda (chemo)and administer my very last screening test before school begins on Tuesday. Spoke in church today, led the singing in Primary and taught a lesson about David and Bathsheba--all before dinner! Happy week everyone :0)

Screening

It's Back To School for the former Miss Gae this week. I'm basking in the glow of 43 little shiny-faced cherubs, each surviving a 40 minute "screening" appointment and the challenge of NOT falling off my rollie chair, which has been extended to its full height to accommodate short stuff sitting at the side of my desk during said appointment for said duration. So far we've only had one casualty--a chin, which whacked my desk on its way down when chin owner, I.B., launched herself, twisting side- to-side in an extended fit of nerves during sound identification. I love my job!

One More Week

I will take one more week off school to overcome this infection. The pain medications for wound care are strong. They make it hard for me to concentrate. I think one more week to recover and to establish routine with healing will be good for me. I have let my concern for school and parents and report cards and upcoming conferences and even Master's classes fade into the background while I try to be realistic about getting well. My family has been great to support me in whatever ways I need. It was nice to have a weekend with Jamilyn at home. Kind neighbors have been available for a variety of needs. I'm getting used to hauling the mini-vac around with me. I can do hard things.

She's Back!

Friday, I returned to Monte Vista Elementary for a personal planning day. I'll be back with my students on Tuesday. I love that old feeling (even though the absence of chalk dust has kind of altered the experience)of walking in to my classroom, smelling the school smells, thinking about the small faces attached to the names taped to the tables, loving my "space" and wanting it ordered. Things were a little wild after eight days with a sub, but it didn't take long to put everything back in its place. I know I'll have more surgery again in May. I guess you could call what I do nowadays "spurt teaching". Ugh. Those trusting little souls will be abandoned to yet another substitute teacher. But kids are resilient! They'll be much better off without me than I will be without them. And we'll all be much better off than the parents will be without "us"! Even so, we're trying to hold the year together so we can all feel the love. Oh, BTW there was a sticky black mousetrap thingy under my bookcase, probably placed there by a well-meaning custodian in my absence. But not to worry! If a mouse gets stuck in there, I have PLENTY of experience snipping both furry and feathered creatures off of those outrageously sick contraptions! No worries--Mrs. Beckstrom is back!

Back

First day back on track. Three new students. So much to do. Too much to remember. Disorganized. So very tired. But, all the sweet little faces were still sunny!

Mundane Life

"Boredom" is a condition I don't accept at Kindergarten. When students try to tell me they're bored, my comeback is always the same--"Well then, unBORE yourself!" I don't think there's any excuse for a boring life as long as we have agency. Even if we're in concentration camp we can choose our own thoughts (see Viktor Frankyl "Man's Search For Meaning".) So, when I figured out today that the reason I'm not enthusiastic about updating my blog is because I feel like my life is too boring to discuss, I knew I was headed for dirt! (Mrs. Beckstrom) "Whose job is it to unbore you?" (Kindergarten) "OURS!" Yes, the fact is well known. So just because I'm off track for three (oh, two) two more weeks with a list of 31 mundane "must-do" tasks on a list is no excuse for a life too boring to write about

My five darling grandchildren loved Halloween. They weren't bored.

Blake is getting in the groove of being scoutmaster again (his favorite church job!) He's not bored.

It's been a year since I finished chemotherapy and I'm still here. Nothing boring about that! BUT LOOK AT THEN:

AND NOW:

See what I mean? I'm stuck in a yuck rut! Still fat. Still scary. Still overwhelmed by the backlog of things to be dealt with and no, this is not my Halloween costume! Report cards are over, the holidays are upon us, beautiful Autumn is in full swing and I'm a temporary Free Bird. If you happen to be in the same funk as I've been in...camped in my computer chair, no signs of sportiness anywhere, munching on leftover trick-or-treat candy, looking like I'm wearing my costume when I'm not, then how about looking yourself in the eye and hollerin'with me...UNBORE YOURSELF!

Just Try To Catch Up

Time to catch up here.

Time flies when you're havin' fun! May 29th--D Track Kindergarten Zoo Day

52 class T-shirts arrived as we were boarding the bus.

We were supposed to be wearing them

to the zoo.

That afternoon I had Avastin scheduled,

but my doc went out of town.

They rescheduled me on voicemail

to come whileI was at the zoo!

Avastin appointments ARE the zoo.

I went on Monday instead.

So I was trash at school on Tues. and Wed.

(this usually happens on the weekend.)

Friday, June 5th I had a mammoram.

THAT HURTS!

But after much crushing, I got the "all clear".

Clear breasts, clear blood, clear urine.

Some news is worth a little pain.

But maybe mammograms cause cancer.

Little Caroline had a birthday.

She was proud to be two years old.

Saturday, she'll be packed up

along with the U-haul

and her parents

and her baby-brother-to-be

and they'll head for law school

at Franklin-Pierce in New Hampshire.

Guess who gets to tag along...

the Granny! (woot!)

June 19th. Avastin. Again.

Then dad died.

My final grades were due.

The house filled with company.

Life got insane.

We had a funeral on

the second-to-the-last day of school.

And school ended.

We've had three grandkid dates

and we've been a little sporty

in the canyons near our city.

I went to Michigan for a week of frivolity

with my Sweet BabyJames.

And I had Avastin for the last time.

The next day we pulled off

a family reunion

and the next Tuesday

I saw Harry Potter!

But first, I attended

Kindergarten Core Academy

that day, and the next day

and the next day.

July 21st teachers went back to work.

My teaching assignment changed suddenly

from split C/D track

to Double D (yep, you heard me)

So I get to track off

and I can help the movers after all!

This week I'll screen

another teacher's C Track students

since she doesn't exist yet...

I'm still officially their teacher.

But on Saturday,

goodbye insanity, and goodbye grandpa...

cuz this Granny's hittin' the road!

Chillaxin' At Last

Reasons to go WILD WITH EXCITEMENT: 1)Fun Parent/Teacher Conferences are FINALLY over--am I too old to say "chillaxin'?" 2)"Someone" (wonderful!) is buying my dad's house 3)Fake spring has come, with a promise of real spring to follow shortly--keep your flipflops closeby. 4)I have new pansies and they are currently alive. 5)Nathan's mission is 1/2 over (I'm donating this "wild" to Jamilyn). 6)My 5th Avastin treatment is over, with only minimal painful, rotten unexpected side effects 7)I had free breakfast on Saturday--yum! Thanks Relief Society! 8)It's finally time to dejunk my own house--lonnnnnng overdue 9)Just four or five weeks until "New Grandson Day"--woot! 10)We're considering going to Michigan for off-track in April for Jamilyn's first graduate recital (!) 11)Adam's going to law school, hopefully close to home (praying our guts out, since they'll really miss Caroline if they have to leave her with us while they attend--two years IS a long time!) 12)I'm composing a list of more productive hobbies for myself since I get to keep living, of which the first is "be sporty with my husband." like I promised. I'm now accepting other suggestions from interested readers. A dozen wild things is a lot of wild.

I Did It!

I did it! My computerized kindergarten grades posted on line!  I'm so TOTALLY impressed with myself. Now I can return to commencing to remembering how to be a regular person. WOOT!!!

No Time

Sheesh! Grades are due in the computer next Thursday and with 51 report cards to prepare, I really can't miss that deadline! I just got all the stuff from my old laptop cloned on to a new laptop this past week (at last) so I can enter grades now. Consequently, I'm too busy to blog right now--there's just not enough time. BTW my district mail folders (very important to me) were all lost in the cloning. Bad, bad, bad technology.

All My Favorite

The first day of school was a blast! I got over my nerves the moment I saw the first rosy face peeking through the door at me--cute kids. I had ridiculously meticulous lesson plans and the classroom was spotless (both a result of my nerves.) My memory isn't what it used to be so I might need a few days to attach 51 names to new little people. But we had P.E. (I love P.E.!) We did letter work and word wall and calendar. We learned about money. We reviewed the discipline chart (my best friend!) We sang and read and played--all my favorite things. Isn't life great? I love the commercial that says something to the effect that if you pick the right job, you never have to "work" again. That's how I felt today, after all that meh :0) Oh, and I am some kind of TIRED!

Ready

After three days working in my classroom until 6:30 at night I think I'm finally ready! My bones ache like I'm 90, but what can ya' do? Nobody seems to know why this is happening to me, so I'd better just start considering it the "new normal". I'm excited to be with the children. I LOVE being a teacher! I hope my office skills don't kill me, since this is the area of my job that constantly challenges me. That and trying to understand my Mac computer without any training! My team leader said that she is glad to have me back. I hope she stays glad. I could sure use to see my cancer cleaning lady, but eventually someone will clean this house!

Chicken!

I spent some time cleaning in my classroom today. I'm still avoiding the real work, which is to write down my curriculum plan for next week. What a chicken! It's easy to feel under control with cleaning. When something's clean and organized, it is. That's it. But I'm insecure about appearing to be "the better deal" after my permanent sub has done such a good job. My kids LOVE her! That's what I hoped for. It's why I picked her. It's why I tried to provide great plans for her, so she could be successful. But now, I feel totally unprepared to fill her shoes! Meh! I know how to do this...I'd better buck up real soon. Monday's a'comin!

Excited and Scared

Today I returned to Monte Vista Elementary to meet my kindergarten classes before they track off tomorrow for 3 1/2 weeks. When they return, I'll be their teacher. I was excited and scared to be back in the classroom. I'm not the girl I used to be these days--not yet. Kindergarten doesn't change much though. There are certain things you can count on--complete honesty, for one thing: "Garrett: Mrs. Beckstrom, I thought you'd look different than you do. Me: Oh really? In what way did you think I'd look different? Garrett: I thought you'd have long hair and blue eyes (a perfect description of my sub) Me: ...but instead you got short, crazy hair and green eyes? I'm sorry I don't look like you expected. Garrett: Yeah, me too. You probably need to go to overhaul!" It's good to be back among the little people.